Winning at the Art of Negotiation

by Janet Pinkerton | Dec 04, 2012

Saying 'What are some ways we can both benefit from these negotiations? Let's invent some new ideas' can do wonders."

Dan Shapiro, Harvard International Negotiation Program founder and director

Years ago, J.R. Samples and his salesman walked into a CIO's office with a $250,000 network proposal, but as the conversation progressed, Samples, then an EVP at an IT engineering firm, had his salesman keep the proposal off the table. They walked out of the meeting with a $50,000 short-term contract to evaluate the company's IT challenges and alternatives — even though consulting wasn't really their firm's focus.

Still, the negotiation was successful.

Six weeks later, the consulting project ended, and the CIO gave them a $400,000 order. In addition to nearly doubling the business with the CIO, that project helped Samples and his company realize that consultancy itself could be a new business opportunity.

"The salesman thought we were in there selling a quarter-million dollar network," Samples recalls, "but when we met with the CIO, it was very clear that he needed some things done, but had a lot of pain and trepidation over understanding where his company was holistically and what its various (IT) alternatives were."

Negotiation success came from taking a risk (by not pushing the original proposal), closely listening to the CIO, and then coming up with an alternative—granted, a lower priced alternative—that addressed the CIO's immediate concerns and cleared the way for larger partnerships.

Negotiation skills are key for IT professionals at any level. "Technology companies are realizing that hard skills are incredibly important, but soft skills are what give IT companies the strategic advantage," says Harvard psychology professor Dan Shapiro, founder and director of the Harvard International Negotiation Program.

Learning Negotiation

How can an IT professional learn negotiation skills? Mentors, books and classes, suggests Samples, now CEO of the Chicago business consulting firm Accountability Partners.

Samples sharpened his skills by taking Karrass negotiation training after working seven years in sales. "I realized my mistakes and learned better methods."

The art of negotiation is not a science; it's more of a practice, says Peter Oliver, principal of Sandler Training | Adventus in Marlborough, Mass. "For me, it happened over time, through a lot of trial and, unfortunately, some error."

Oliver took a negotiations class as a college elective. "I wanted to understand the best way to put myself in a good position to get deals done in business." Later in his career, Oliver invested in Sandler Training classes and wound up buying a franchise.

"The best way to learn is to put yourself in to a position where you are actually negotiating," Oliver says, suggesting books such as "Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In, " a book first written in 1981 by Roger Fisher and William L. Ury, and also "The Sandler Rules: 49 Timeless Selling Principles and How to Apply Them," a best-seller about David L.Sandler's selling system written by Sandler Training CEO David Mattson.

Negotiation Tips

Be prepared. "Being prepared means having a plan of negotiation," says Samples. "It's knowing 'How much am I willing to do today, how much tomorrow or how much later on?' "

Work to understand the pressures, pains, sense of urgency and needs the other party is experiencing. Oliver believes that "knowing what would give the other person the upper hand is more important than knowing what would give you the upper hand. The better you understand the perspective of the person you are dealing with, the easier it usually is to reach a deal."

How do to do this? Listen more; talk less. Ask open-ended questions that begin with "Why" or "How" to learn more about the other person's needs and objectives. Avoid closed-ended questions that start with "Do" or "Will." "The better job you do of asking open-ended questions, the easier it is to learn where the conversation should lead," says Oliver.

Know when you are negotiating. "Sometimes people are not savvy enough to understand when relationships with the prospect have moved from a selling, 'Why-should-I-buy-from-you' mode into a negotiating scenario," says Samples. "So they start discounting, unnecessarily." When the conversation shifts from sales into negotiation, "That's a completely different communication environment—one in which you become a business partner," he said.  

Collaborate and Compromise. "In a win/win, both sides may need to give up something to get the deal done," says Oliver. "However, the more you collaborate, the less you'll compromise. What you don't want is a win/lose, or a lose/win. If the other party loses (in an negotiated outcome), the relationship usually stops there."

A Framework

Shapiro and Fisher promote their book and provide free negotiation skill tools at the Beyond Reason website, but Shapiro outlined the basics for CompTIA. According to this framework, the five rational components to address in any negotiation are:

  • Interests. Shapiro suggests focusing not on what people say they want, but on the interests underlying their requests. Getting to those interests requires listening, asking questions and research. If you know the opposing party's underlying interests, Shapiro says, perhaps those interests could be addressed in a different way than the original request.

  • Options. Shapiro urges people to move beyond the typical discussion of "my option" or "your option" by using creativity to "invent options for mutual gain." "Saying 'What are some ways we can both benefit from these negotiations? Let's invent some new ideas' can do wonders," says Shapiro.

  • Legitimacy. Move a negotiation beyond an adversarial battle of wills, by focusing not on what people will or will not do, but what they should do. "Bring in standards of fairness," says Shapiro. This can require research—to determine what's been done in similar situations, and to build a case for what is merited.

  • Commitments. People make assumptions, especially during negotiations, so Shapiro emphasizes that it's important that negotiating parties detail their commitments to make sure they are clear, realistic, achievable and mutually understood.

  • Alternatives. Alternatives are what can happen if an agreement isn't reached. Knowing your alternatives can help strengthen your negotiations, Shapiro says.

Beyond these rational issues, emotions are at play too. An IT professional can't directly address all the emotions flying around during multi-party negotiations, but he or she can deal with the core emotional concerns that matter to everybody. According to Shapiro and Fisher in "Beyond Reason," these core five emotional concerns include:

  • Appreciation. "Does each person feel heard and valued?" queries Shapiro.

  • Autonomy. Recognize that each party wants the freedom to make decisions, act, feel and think. "No one likes to feel imposed upon or unduly told what to do," says Shapiro.

  • Affiliation. Affiliation is the emotional connection between yourself and the other party(s). Need a simple way to build affiliation, maybe turn an adversary into a colleague? "Ask advice," says Shapiro. "Ask that person 'What's your advice? How do we deal with this problem together?' It's a very simple thing to say, but its impact can be very profound."

  • Status. "Don't compete over status during negotiations" says Shapiro. "Respect it."

  • Role. Take a hard look at how you approach negotiations. "Are you playing the role of adversary? Confronter? Accommodator? Problem-solver? Avoider?" queries Shapiro. "Is that role serving your purpose? If no, reconsider roles."

Negotiation is about dealing with differences, says Shapiro. "You can deal with differences in many ways—with hostility, suspicion, amicability. Each way has predictable outcomes. Recognize you have a choice."

So, he says, be hard on the problems within a negotiation, but soft on the people. "You want to build the best, most constructively positive relationships you possibly can so you can be working together on these differences and shared problems."

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